Ranking the 5 best nicknames in Utah Jazz franchise history

Utah Jazz celebrates with teammate Greg Ostertag as head coach Jerry Sloan (far right) looks on during the Jazz 78-73 win over the Chicago Bulls in Game 4 of the NBA Finals at the Delta Center in Salt Lake City, Utah.
Utah Jazz celebrates with teammate Greg Ostertag as head coach Jerry Sloan (far right) looks on during the Jazz 78-73 win over the Chicago Bulls in Game 4 of the NBA Finals at the Delta Center in Salt Lake City, Utah.
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Andrei Kirilenko of the Utah Jazz (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)

#1: Andrei Kirilenko, aka AK-47

The AK-47 is one of the most popular rifles in the world still, and given its Russian origin, it only makes sense to bestow that nickname upon a Russian player. Andrei Kirilenko has “AK” as his initials and fittingly wore the number 47, so this was really a freebie.

Kirilenko was a solid starting forward in ten seasons with the Jazz and made one All-Star appearance. He is the commissioner of Russian basketball, so his post-NBA life has been quite good.

I would say AK-47 is one of the best nicknames in NBA history. “King” James, His Airness, and The Greek Freak really don’t take much creativity, and frankly neither does AK-47, but it’s perfect. It pays homage to his homeland, is definitely intimidating, and his number and initials fit in there as well. Dr. J, The Human Highlight Reel, The Iceman, and Magic all take a bit of thought and effort, but when absolutely no thought and effort is required and the result is still fantastic, that’s the road I want to take.

PG13 and CP3 are fine and dandy, but ultimately lazy. CP3 doesn’t mean anything, and PG-13 is a well-known movie rating, but neither says anything about Chris Paul or Paul George, other than they have a first name, a last name, and a number. AK-47 suggests that Kirilenko also possesses those (as does every other NBA player ever, other than Nene), but his actually means something when it stands alone, and that thing is scary. On top of that, the Russian tie-in is incredible, so Andrei has my vote.