This Utah Jazz fan has had his fill; please, no more video games, Donovan Mitchell
By Lucas Miller
As a lifelong fan of the Utah Jazz, I’d follow a talent like Donovan Mitchell to the ends of the earth. In no way, shape or form, however, does that include to his living room couch to watch him play video games for hours on end — I have my dignity.
Growing up, I tried to get in to video games — I really did.
I’d get together with my buddies on a Friday night to play “Halo” or “Super Smash Bros.” For as much effort as I put forth, quickly and in the right order, I couldn’t ever get my fingers to do the things my brain was telling ‘em to do.
By chance, have you seen that episode of “The Office” where Jim’s playing “Call of Duty” with his co-workers at the Stamford branch? If you haven’t, check it out — this was my harsh reality:
Just like Jim, if any kind of gun was ever in my possession in one of those uber violent “killing” games, I’d get stuck in a corner, unable to turn around and actually use it. Death was eminent.
My overall effectiveness was limited to “Super Smash Bros.” I’d play with Donkey Kong, grab my opponent and simply walk off the edge of the floating platform thingy in a kamikaze mission of sorts. I’d lose a life in the process, but hey — at least I was now a mildly threatening force.
Which brings me to the point I’m making today: I couldn’t care less about watching grown men play video games, even if one of them happens to be the Utah Jazz’s own Donovan Mitchell.
The NBA is entertaining in that it brings together the most gifted basketball players in the world for an audience’s viewing pleasure. As strange as it is to me, there are actually gamers who make a ridiculously comfortable living, earning up to $15,000 (plus bonuses) for a single tournament.
Again, though — they’re the best in the world at what they do.
With that framework established, watching Trae Young, Devin Booker and Kevin Durant go at each other in an NBA 2K tournament makes about as much sense as tuning in to watch Richard “Ninja” Blevins and a few of his gaming cohorts tackle a dunk contest with a Fisher-Price hoop.
The NBA caught some insane flak for the shoddy, mid-quarantine H-O-R-S-E tournament it put on. In their defense, though, Chris Paul, Zach LaVine and Allie Quigley are some of the deadliest shooters on the planet — the logic is there.
It didn’t hurt that Utah Jazz guard Mike Conley took it down, either.
Sadly, this gaming gimmick is becoming a bit of a trend with Spida …
Airing two weeks back on ESPN2, playing with the Brooklyn Nets, Mitchell missed a buzzer-beating three-point attempt with Spencer Dinwiddie to force overtime against Rui Hachimura and the Los Angeles Lakers in the first round of a 16-player NBA 2K Players Tournament.
Yesterday, as luck would have it, we sat through more gaming goodness:
https://twitter.com/SLAMonline/status/1251626533241982979
Only this time around, instead of NBA and WNBA players taking to a game that at least features themselves, we saw how they’d operate as Commander-in-Chief in a time of modern warfare.
Outfit these guys (and gals) with a Mountain Dew-filled mini fridge and an endless supply of Cheetos Puffs to complete the picture if you must, but packaged as is, this ain’t it, folks.
Look, I’m bored and craving Utah Jazz basketball just as much as the next dude, but there are much less embarrassing ways to satisfy your Hoops Habit: NBA podcasts, YouTube highlights classic games and “The Last Dance” documentary over on ESPN, just to name a few.
You could even bust out your No. 45 Mitchell jersey and get up a few shots in the driveway …
But please — anything but more video games.